Forgive. Forget.

“Forgive and forget”

A message to a teenager:

Over the years, people have hurt you – you expected this as a teenager. Boys don’t treat you right, girls are hateful and rude, and in general, not everything goes your way.

No matter how much it hurt, no matter how many nights you spent crying in your parents arms, or sobbing quietly in bed, or screaming and wondering what made you deserve being treated liked absolute shit, you’ve always found a way to forgive. Forgive that boy, that girl, whoever. Because you know that the weight of not forgiving is far heavier than the weight of hurting. It’s pointless not to forgive. Everyone makes mistakes and you realise that.

Forgiveness is not the hard thing. Forgetting is.

Time allows you to move on, grow happy again. Find a new love, a new friend, a new hobby. You’ve forgiven whatever hurt you a long time again. But you haven’t forgotten the pain that they inflicted on your soul. When you remember it, unexplainable feelings simmer to the surface, your heart begins to ache, your voice grows angry. All the emotions rush back, pumps through your blood, infect your mind, your thoughts. The feeling of worthlessness returns – the one you so wanted to bury.

Yes, forgiving someone is easy, but forgetting what they did is impossible. The two should not be confused, nor treated the same way. It’s ok to remember, to forget, to forgive, to do whatever you need to do, so that you feel important again. Your own person. You.

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